It's been a little bit since I wrote last and within the last week I have been wanting to sit down and write again. Josh and I celebrated 5 years of marriage this last weekend. I can't believe it's been 5 years already. As I look back at our relatively short time we've been married God has led us through so much and all I can do is praise Him for his goodness to us. We've been through nursing school (twice; if you don't know the story, ask me later), we've been through the oilfield slowing down tremendously, Josh having to be off of work because of his eye issue he had for a while there, his father with cancer, living in a duplex in Burns Flat to living in our camper for a year (while going through nursing school), then buying a house, and lastly having our son. We have had several ups and downs but God has always been faithful.
Beringer is almost 19 months old now and he amazes me every day. He talks constantly and is always asking to watch "HooHooHaaHaa" which being interpreted means Curious George. He loves running after our chickens, feeding them, and watering them. He is always wanting to go outside and explore. He is sassy, loveable, smart, and loves to have stories read to him.
Since Beringer has come along and turned our world upside down I am learning more and more how at the end of the day all that matters is family. I've been working through some personal things the last month or so and God continues to speak these words over me, "I have made you. I have chosen you to be the wife and mother you are". I remind myself of these words when I get angry, hurt, upset, or frustrated... with those around me. Some do not understand because they do not have children of their own or are just plain rude. Others just like to give me advice on how I should be doing things differently for my son because of how they raised their own children. In turn, I choose not to be around those who frustrate/hurt me because of their lack of knowledge/experience and for those who give me advice on how to raise Beringer I just remind them they already had the opportunity to raise their children and the choices I make in raising mine is of my concern alone. Then I go in the bedroom, hold my son, and pray for patience and peace. God reminds me of who I am. He reminds me of the most important task He has given me. He reminds me how He has equipped me with everything I'll need to fulfill His purpose in my life. I am growing. I am changing. It hurts but it is liberating. I am making new revelation. Don't get me wrong. I am not saying I know everything there is to being a mother. I listen to wise counsel and heed sound advice but when I am belittled for my choices or excluded because of my son, I have to decide how to handle each situation as they come. Some are easier to make than others but each decision is made with my son's best interest in mind. It all comes down to family. They are what matter.
I guess my point is this: Things are going to happen in life that will make you re-evaluate decisions, ways you are living, how time is spent. People will come and people will go. Everyone will have an opinion or their two cents to put in. There are those that will say they want to spend time with you but make no attempts at seeing you. People will hurt you. It is what you do in response that matters. It's about loving in spite of anger or hurt. It's about who's still standing there beside you when the dust settles. It's about family or those you consider family.
I would love to sit and write so much more but I can't. Beringer just woke up and he needs to go back to sleep. Just remember who is important. If you're a mom struggling with some of the issues I talked about above- YOU ARE NOT ALONE. You are valuable, important, and have a high calling. You are raising sons and daughters to grow up to be loving, respectable, honest adults. You have to make decisions for them now that will allow them to thrive. Whether that means stepping away from people who don't understand how truly valuable your child is or if it means to stand your ground on decisions you've made in raising your child; God will guide you. Let him.
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Wednesday, October 26, 2016
Wednesday, August 10, 2016
Ain't Nobody Got Time for That
To be a friend you must show yourself friendly. My mom always told me growing up I wouldn't have friends if I didn't talk to the group of kids on the playground and ask them to play. She was right. Sometimes I would leave the playground having no friends because I was too shy or scared and other times I wouldn't want to leave because of the new friends I had made.
Today I have 2 or 3 people (outside of my family) that I consider close friends. They can call me up on the phone when we haven't talked in weeks and it's no big deal. They can show up in pj's and a messy bun unannounced and I wouldn't bat an eye. We can cry, laugh, and even disagree with no fear of judgement.
Here's the weird thing; I'm not that great of a friend. Let's be honest. I don't respond to texts all the time. I ignore phone calls when I'm busy, can't handle drama, or simply don't want to talk. I don't always empathize well and I am normally pretty blunt. I have these awesome ideas of lunch dates, dinner dates, movies, etc. with friends. In reality, I don't have that kind of time or motivation. I have a kid and so do most of my friends. Unless you want to come to my house, pop open a bottle of wine, and chit chat while I make dinner, (or my kid naps, or he's running around naked on the back porch). That is about the extent most of the time of my friendly get togethers.
Sometimes this is very difficult. "Couple Friends" are nearly nonexistent. Josh doesn't have a set schedule. He works crazy hours and the time he does have at home we try to spend with our little family, extended family, or occasionally a date night. The idea of getting together with another couple to do something is a pipe dream at this point in time. Believe me when I say I'm not complaining. It's just where we are in life right now. Outside of work and family we don't have much down time and if we do we don't have friends we can call up on a whim to get together with anyway.
Maybe this is a phase of life everyone goes through. Maybe we just don't put in enough effort in this area of our lives, who knows. If you're my friend, thanks for being there when I'm not that awesome of a friend. To those who just want to hang out with a messy bun and pajama bottoms with little chance of going on an outing; let's make it happen.
Not sure that there was really any big point to this post. There was just a lot on my mind and I needed it out. If you are where I am in life; here's a shout out to you. If you've been where I am now, tell me if there's a solution to this conundrum. If you have no idea what I'm talking about then you are probably one of those people on Facebook going out all the time with friends and I'm sitting there wondering where your kids are (Sorry).
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Today I have 2 or 3 people (outside of my family) that I consider close friends. They can call me up on the phone when we haven't talked in weeks and it's no big deal. They can show up in pj's and a messy bun unannounced and I wouldn't bat an eye. We can cry, laugh, and even disagree with no fear of judgement.
Here's the weird thing; I'm not that great of a friend. Let's be honest. I don't respond to texts all the time. I ignore phone calls when I'm busy, can't handle drama, or simply don't want to talk. I don't always empathize well and I am normally pretty blunt. I have these awesome ideas of lunch dates, dinner dates, movies, etc. with friends. In reality, I don't have that kind of time or motivation. I have a kid and so do most of my friends. Unless you want to come to my house, pop open a bottle of wine, and chit chat while I make dinner, (or my kid naps, or he's running around naked on the back porch). That is about the extent most of the time of my friendly get togethers.
Sometimes this is very difficult. "Couple Friends" are nearly nonexistent. Josh doesn't have a set schedule. He works crazy hours and the time he does have at home we try to spend with our little family, extended family, or occasionally a date night. The idea of getting together with another couple to do something is a pipe dream at this point in time. Believe me when I say I'm not complaining. It's just where we are in life right now. Outside of work and family we don't have much down time and if we do we don't have friends we can call up on a whim to get together with anyway.
Maybe this is a phase of life everyone goes through. Maybe we just don't put in enough effort in this area of our lives, who knows. If you're my friend, thanks for being there when I'm not that awesome of a friend. To those who just want to hang out with a messy bun and pajama bottoms with little chance of going on an outing; let's make it happen.
Not sure that there was really any big point to this post. There was just a lot on my mind and I needed it out. If you are where I am in life; here's a shout out to you. If you've been where I am now, tell me if there's a solution to this conundrum. If you have no idea what I'm talking about then you are probably one of those people on Facebook going out all the time with friends and I'm sitting there wondering where your kids are (Sorry).
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Ain't Nobody Got Time for That
To be a friend you must show yourself friendly. My mom always told my growing up I wouldn't have friends if I didn't talk to the group of kids on the playground and ask them to play. She was right. Sometimes I would leave the playground having no friends because I was too shy or scared and other times I wouldn't want to leave because of the new friends I had made.
Today I have 2 or 3 people (outside of my family) that I consider close friends. They can call me up on the phone when we haven't talked in weeks and it's no big deal. They can show up in pj's and a messy bun unannounced and I wouldn't bat an eye. We can cry, laugh, and even disagree with no fear of judgement.
Here's the weird thing; I'm not that great of a friend. Let's be honest. I don't respond to texts all the time. I ignore phone calls when I'm busy, can't handle drama, or simply don't want to talk. I don't always empathize well and I am normally pretty blunt. I have these awesome ideas of lunch dates, dinner dates, movies, etc. with friends. In reality, I don't have that kind of time or motivation. I have a kid and so do most of my friends. Unless you want to come to my house, pop open a bottle of wine, and chit chat while I make dinner, (or my kid naps, or he's running around naked on the back porch). That is about the extent most of the time of my friendly get togethers.
Sometimes this is very difficult. "Couple Friends" are nearly nonexistent. Josh doesn't have a set schedule. He works crazy hours and the time he does have at home we try to spend with our little family, extended family, or occasionally a date night. The idea of getting together with another couple to do something is a pipe dream at this point in time. Believe me when I say I'm not complaining. It's just where we are in life right now. Outside of work and family we don't have much down time and if we do we don't have friends we can call up on a whim to get together with anyway.
Maybe this is a phase of life everyone goes through. Maybe we just don't put in enough effort in this area of our lives, who knows. If you're my friend, thanks for being there when I'm not that awesome of a friend. To those who just want to hang out with a messy bun and pajama bottoms with little chance of going on an outing; let's make it happen.
Not sure that there was really any big point to this post. There was just a lot on my mind and I needed it out. If you are where I am in life; here's a shout out to you. If you've been where I am now, tell me if there's a solution to this conundrum. If you have no idea what I'm talking about then you are probably one of those people on Facebook going out all the time with friends and I'm sitting there wondering where your kids are (Sorry).
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Today I have 2 or 3 people (outside of my family) that I consider close friends. They can call me up on the phone when we haven't talked in weeks and it's no big deal. They can show up in pj's and a messy bun unannounced and I wouldn't bat an eye. We can cry, laugh, and even disagree with no fear of judgement.
Here's the weird thing; I'm not that great of a friend. Let's be honest. I don't respond to texts all the time. I ignore phone calls when I'm busy, can't handle drama, or simply don't want to talk. I don't always empathize well and I am normally pretty blunt. I have these awesome ideas of lunch dates, dinner dates, movies, etc. with friends. In reality, I don't have that kind of time or motivation. I have a kid and so do most of my friends. Unless you want to come to my house, pop open a bottle of wine, and chit chat while I make dinner, (or my kid naps, or he's running around naked on the back porch). That is about the extent most of the time of my friendly get togethers.
Sometimes this is very difficult. "Couple Friends" are nearly nonexistent. Josh doesn't have a set schedule. He works crazy hours and the time he does have at home we try to spend with our little family, extended family, or occasionally a date night. The idea of getting together with another couple to do something is a pipe dream at this point in time. Believe me when I say I'm not complaining. It's just where we are in life right now. Outside of work and family we don't have much down time and if we do we don't have friends we can call up on a whim to get together with anyway.
Maybe this is a phase of life everyone goes through. Maybe we just don't put in enough effort in this area of our lives, who knows. If you're my friend, thanks for being there when I'm not that awesome of a friend. To those who just want to hang out with a messy bun and pajama bottoms with little chance of going on an outing; let's make it happen.
Not sure that there was really any big point to this post. There was just a lot on my mind and I needed it out. If you are where I am in life; here's a shout out to you. If you've been where I am now, tell me if there's a solution to this conundrum. If you have no idea what I'm talking about then you are probably one of those people on Facebook going out all the time with friends and I'm sitting there wondering where your kids are (Sorry).
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Tuesday, May 10, 2016
Just One
Hold the phone! No, seriously. Hang on just a minute. One whole year ago I brought a baby boy into this world. That was a year ago? I don't know how I feel about my little boy already being one year old. I know I can't slow down time but oh, how I wish I could. I will admit, I cried on his birthday. My son can walk and talk and let you know exactly how he feels about something. He is smart. He is funny. HE IS SASSY! He knows how to push my buttons and give me the silliest grin when he is in trouble and he knows it. He's one of the best things that's ever happened in my life.
Nearly every night I pray and ask God to guide me in raising Beringer. I want Beringer to know Christ. Not just know ABOUT Him; not just sing songs or hear stories but truly KNOW God the Father and have a personal relationship with Him. It's my job to lead by example. Do the words I say and the things I do show my son his mother has relationship with Jesus? I know he's just one but he's still watching and listening. Yes, he's just one but he's taking in the world around him like a sponge.
Just one. How many things happen with "just one"...? It takes just one word to bring laughter or tears. Just one touch to bring love or pain. Just one smile to brighten someone's day. Just one glare to turn a day dark. Just one choice can bring life or death. How strong is the realization of just one?! Just one person can change the world. Just one person did change the world when He took our sins to the cross.
My Beringer boy is just one yet, he has a lifetime of "just one's" ahead of him. I, as his mother, must remember that my "just one's" impact his life daily. It takes one remark to build confidence or tear it down. It takes one glance to know if I'm watching him and taking interest in what he's doing. One kiss and one hug to let him know he is loved. As he lies asleep beside me I thank God for giving me this blue-eyed, mischievous, little boy and pray that my never ending list of just ones will be mostly positive and uplifting. I know I will falter and make mistakes like every parent does but hopefully my positive outweighs the negative.
So do you get the point of this post? The world is made up of thousands of just one's. Don't take it lightly. Choose wisely, walk humbly.
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Nearly every night I pray and ask God to guide me in raising Beringer. I want Beringer to know Christ. Not just know ABOUT Him; not just sing songs or hear stories but truly KNOW God the Father and have a personal relationship with Him. It's my job to lead by example. Do the words I say and the things I do show my son his mother has relationship with Jesus? I know he's just one but he's still watching and listening. Yes, he's just one but he's taking in the world around him like a sponge.
Just one. How many things happen with "just one"...? It takes just one word to bring laughter or tears. Just one touch to bring love or pain. Just one smile to brighten someone's day. Just one glare to turn a day dark. Just one choice can bring life or death. How strong is the realization of just one?! Just one person can change the world. Just one person did change the world when He took our sins to the cross.
My Beringer boy is just one yet, he has a lifetime of "just one's" ahead of him. I, as his mother, must remember that my "just one's" impact his life daily. It takes one remark to build confidence or tear it down. It takes one glance to know if I'm watching him and taking interest in what he's doing. One kiss and one hug to let him know he is loved. As he lies asleep beside me I thank God for giving me this blue-eyed, mischievous, little boy and pray that my never ending list of just ones will be mostly positive and uplifting. I know I will falter and make mistakes like every parent does but hopefully my positive outweighs the negative.
So do you get the point of this post? The world is made up of thousands of just one's. Don't take it lightly. Choose wisely, walk humbly.
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Friday, February 5, 2016
Consider the Ant
Have you ever just sat in the grass and watched ants work? I remember doing this as a child and was always amazed at how strong the ants were. They were always busy! I mean seriously, have you ever seen an ant sleeping?... I didn't think so. I'd sit and watch them and then feel bad for just watching so I'd have to get up and find something to do.
Proverbs 6:6 says,"Go to the ant, thou sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise".
Many places in the Bible it talks about laziness and never once is it looked at in a positive light. Now it does talk about resting, having a day of rest, etcetera. Don't get laziness and rest mixed up. These are two very different things. Laziness is a choice whereas rest is a necessity.
I've never understood the mind set of a lazy person nor will I ever understand. From a very young age I was taught to work. Whether it was by helping around the house with chores or earning money for different things I wanted. I remember being 10 years old and riding my bike through the neighborhood with a friend, asking to wash people's cars for money! As I got older I babysat, saved aluminum cans, delivered groceries, threw news papers... there was always some way to make money for the different things I wanted. My parents made sure I and my siblings had what we needed and they sometimes just gave us things they knew we wanted because they loved us. They loved us enough though also to teach us the value of hard work and the pitfalls of a lazy character.
Proverbs 13:4 - The soul of the sluggard desireth, and [hath] nothing: but the soul of the diligent shall be made fat.
There's a law of reaping and sowing. Whatever you 'plant' is what you will get back. This law is with anything in life. If you only give 50% in a relationship, that's probably what you're going to get back and the relationship will suffer. If you want to have a steak dinner but work just long enough to earn hot dogs and macaroni and cheese; guess what you're going to eat for dinner?
A friend I know works her tail off and has allowed me to use some of her story. She has two sons and a fiancé. Because she has the ability to make a better income right now rather than her fiancé, she is the breadwinner while he stays home with their kids. I've known this woman to work nearly a month straight in order to have the overtime hours so she could put money in savings. She works hard and provides well for her family. Her bills are paid. Food is on the table. Clothes are on her kid's backs, and on top of her full time job, she also has a second job selling makeup. I'm happy to say she's going back to school soon to become a nurse and I guarantee you she'll succeed. Why? Because laziness is not part of her character.
Proverbs 10:4 - He becometh poor that dealeth [with] a slack hand: but the hand of the diligent maketh rich.
I understand everyone needs a hand up at some point in life but if that hand up turns into a constant hand out; that's a problem. Be vigilant. Are you letting pride get in the way when you turn down a job flipping burgers or a custodian position because you think you're better than that job? Will that job put food on the table and pay the electric bill? It may not be a dream job but don't wait for the dream job to fall in your lap all the while your debt is piling up.
Colossians 3:23 - And whatsoever ye do, do [it] heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men.
I end with this: regardless of your position in life; work hard! Take pride in what you do and give it 100%. No one starts at the top, but with hard work and dedication, goals can be achieved. Laziness will get you absolutely nowhere positive in life. Consider the ants and learn something new.
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Proverbs 6:6 says,"Go to the ant, thou sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise".
Many places in the Bible it talks about laziness and never once is it looked at in a positive light. Now it does talk about resting, having a day of rest, etcetera. Don't get laziness and rest mixed up. These are two very different things. Laziness is a choice whereas rest is a necessity.
I've never understood the mind set of a lazy person nor will I ever understand. From a very young age I was taught to work. Whether it was by helping around the house with chores or earning money for different things I wanted. I remember being 10 years old and riding my bike through the neighborhood with a friend, asking to wash people's cars for money! As I got older I babysat, saved aluminum cans, delivered groceries, threw news papers... there was always some way to make money for the different things I wanted. My parents made sure I and my siblings had what we needed and they sometimes just gave us things they knew we wanted because they loved us. They loved us enough though also to teach us the value of hard work and the pitfalls of a lazy character.
Proverbs 13:4 - The soul of the sluggard desireth, and [hath] nothing: but the soul of the diligent shall be made fat.
There's a law of reaping and sowing. Whatever you 'plant' is what you will get back. This law is with anything in life. If you only give 50% in a relationship, that's probably what you're going to get back and the relationship will suffer. If you want to have a steak dinner but work just long enough to earn hot dogs and macaroni and cheese; guess what you're going to eat for dinner?
A friend I know works her tail off and has allowed me to use some of her story. She has two sons and a fiancé. Because she has the ability to make a better income right now rather than her fiancé, she is the breadwinner while he stays home with their kids. I've known this woman to work nearly a month straight in order to have the overtime hours so she could put money in savings. She works hard and provides well for her family. Her bills are paid. Food is on the table. Clothes are on her kid's backs, and on top of her full time job, she also has a second job selling makeup. I'm happy to say she's going back to school soon to become a nurse and I guarantee you she'll succeed. Why? Because laziness is not part of her character.
Proverbs 10:4 - He becometh poor that dealeth [with] a slack hand: but the hand of the diligent maketh rich.
I understand everyone needs a hand up at some point in life but if that hand up turns into a constant hand out; that's a problem. Be vigilant. Are you letting pride get in the way when you turn down a job flipping burgers or a custodian position because you think you're better than that job? Will that job put food on the table and pay the electric bill? It may not be a dream job but don't wait for the dream job to fall in your lap all the while your debt is piling up.
Colossians 3:23 - And whatsoever ye do, do [it] heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men.
I end with this: regardless of your position in life; work hard! Take pride in what you do and give it 100%. No one starts at the top, but with hard work and dedication, goals can be achieved. Laziness will get you absolutely nowhere positive in life. Consider the ants and learn something new.
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Sunday, January 3, 2016
Let Me Hold You
"Let me hold you". I feel like I've been saying this a lot the last few weeks. My Beringer boy has both top teeth coming in at the same time and he's also learned different tactics to help him fight sleep. Naps haven't been difficult. It's when he goes down for the night that it's like a switch has been flipped and all of a sudden he fights sleep like he's in a boxing ring. I'll never understand why babies fight sleep like they do.
When he starts getting tired he comes to me for comfort. He wants me to hold him and let him nurse. When his eyes start to get heavy and his lids start to close is when he begins to fight. He will move away from me, begin go chatter, kick his feet, wave his arms, and slap himself- just so he won't fall asleep. It is during this time I begin rocking him and saying, "Let me hold you, son". "Let me rock you". "Let me hold you". And I question why he feels the need to fight. Wouldn't it just be easier to just rest?
I found myself asking these questions today as I tell my tired child, "Let me hold you". When I said this aloud to him, I felt my Heavenly Father whisper the same phrase to me. Then I cried.
The last month or two has been very difficult for me. I'm exhausted, not only physically, but emotionally, spiritually, and any other way you can be- just plain tired. Don't misunderstand, I'm not depressed. I don't need the next best energy pill or diet. I'm beyond thankful for the role God has given me as wife and mother. I'm just exhausted. I know too that I'm not the only woman who has felt this way. You know what it is like to try keeping the balance of responsibilities- cooking, cleaning, laundry, bathing, feeding, comforting, (both son and husband) etc. That's just the tip of the iceberg if we're being honest but for sake of time I'll go no further. I feel worn out!
So like I said earlier, I began crying. God's soft words were a balm. "Let me hold you". I can find rest in my Saviour. He was simply reminding me. How many times have we 'fought sleep'? All the while God was rocking, whispering, "Just let me hold you". But, for whatever reason, we continue to fight and He just shakes his head and wonders why. We don't see how if we'd just rest, we'd be better off. We come to the Father for comfort but when He wants us to give in completely we begin to chatter, kick our feet, and wave our arms around.
Here's the point- find rest in the Saviour. We weren't created to do life alone. He wants to walk right beside us. He is Comforter. Find comfort in Him. When life gets tough and you're exhausted, He is waiting, whipering, "Let Me hold you".
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
When he starts getting tired he comes to me for comfort. He wants me to hold him and let him nurse. When his eyes start to get heavy and his lids start to close is when he begins to fight. He will move away from me, begin go chatter, kick his feet, wave his arms, and slap himself- just so he won't fall asleep. It is during this time I begin rocking him and saying, "Let me hold you, son". "Let me rock you". "Let me hold you". And I question why he feels the need to fight. Wouldn't it just be easier to just rest?
I found myself asking these questions today as I tell my tired child, "Let me hold you". When I said this aloud to him, I felt my Heavenly Father whisper the same phrase to me. Then I cried.
The last month or two has been very difficult for me. I'm exhausted, not only physically, but emotionally, spiritually, and any other way you can be- just plain tired. Don't misunderstand, I'm not depressed. I don't need the next best energy pill or diet. I'm beyond thankful for the role God has given me as wife and mother. I'm just exhausted. I know too that I'm not the only woman who has felt this way. You know what it is like to try keeping the balance of responsibilities- cooking, cleaning, laundry, bathing, feeding, comforting, (both son and husband) etc. That's just the tip of the iceberg if we're being honest but for sake of time I'll go no further. I feel worn out!
So like I said earlier, I began crying. God's soft words were a balm. "Let me hold you". I can find rest in my Saviour. He was simply reminding me. How many times have we 'fought sleep'? All the while God was rocking, whispering, "Just let me hold you". But, for whatever reason, we continue to fight and He just shakes his head and wonders why. We don't see how if we'd just rest, we'd be better off. We come to the Father for comfort but when He wants us to give in completely we begin to chatter, kick our feet, and wave our arms around.
Here's the point- find rest in the Saviour. We weren't created to do life alone. He wants to walk right beside us. He is Comforter. Find comfort in Him. When life gets tough and you're exhausted, He is waiting, whipering, "Let Me hold you".
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
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