That's right, everyone! We are having a boy! We found out Monday and got to see his little face, hands, feet, and hear his heartbeat again. The ultrasound tech was able to tell right off the bat we have a little boy growing in there. We debated back and forth for a long time whether we were going to invite our mom's to go with us but in the end decided it should just be him and me. I think that was the best decision and it was very special for us.
That night we met our parents, my sister, and her husband at a steakhouse and bought everyone blue drinks to make the announcement! There was hollering and cheering and clapping and apparently there were bets being made between our parents on the way to the steakhouse.
I am now 18 weeks along and feel great. The baby is moving more and more. Josh was able to feel him move for the first time just the other day. Yes, I cried and he was so excited! Baby B was kicking up a storm there for a little while.
We took about a week off from work and painted the nursery monkey colors! Our theme is Curious George...if anyone wanted to know. We also finished some stuff on the 'honey-do list' that has been needing to get done for a while. Josh woke up this morning pretty sick. I must say this is the first time I have taken care of Josh while he is actually sick (not just a cough and runny nose). Thankfully, we don't get sick that often I guess.
We just recently celebrated our three year anniversary! It's seems like we just got married a few months ago at times and here we are expecting our first baby. It has been a roller coaster ride so far and I think we are about to get on a new roller coaster filled with loops, dark tunnels, and a few sharp turns. It's all about who's sitting in the seat beside you though that makes the ride fun, right? I know I have the one God chose for me sitting right beside me. That's all that matters. Sometimes I find myself taking a mental step back and seeing how our life is unfolding. I gotta say, this picture is way better than the one I ever imagined for myself. God continues to show us just exactly who He is and we are grateful every day for each of his blessings. I'm really trying to learn how to just be still and know that our awesome Heavenly Father has every single thing under His control. At times I get anxious about stuff and begin to worry but I am constantly reminded that He's got this! He's got the whole thing and all I need to do is enjoy the ride; trust Him. Sometimes that's easier said than done and it's a lesson I don't know if I will ever come to completely understand but I do know this- He's teaching me every single day.
I don't have anything too deep to say this go-around but sometimes it's the simple things that count. So here it is put simply- love God, love others, enjoy life, trust when life is fun AND when it gets rocky because God didn't promise that every step would be easy.
You'll hear from me again soon! Don't you know Autumn is my favorite season? I always find more things to write about when there are so many festivities!
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Thursday, November 6, 2014
Thursday, August 7, 2014
It's About Time...
Since it has been over a year ago since I last posted anything I figured it was about time to do so.
Just about everything from A to Z has happened since my post last July; so I'll start with August of 2013.
August I started nursing school back up. I cried daily for about a week straight and a quite a few times in the months following. The idea that I was starting all over again was unbearable. I didn't think I had the strength or willpower to complete it. God came through; just like He always does. He strengthened me and maybe I didn't always push forward for the right reasons but nevertheless, I pushed on. Many times, it was out of the desire to prove to the previous teachers and director over me I was called to be a nurse, no matter what they thought about me. God has called me from a very young age to be a nurse and I could not let what they thought or said get in the way of what God had destined inside me. I spent 10 grueling months in a fast paced program! You know what though? I learned a heck of a lot more than I did before. I had teachers that wanted us to learn, believed in each one of us, and wanted to see us succeed. The whole class dynamics were much different. We were a team, a group on the same journey with the same goals in mind. Did I get along with everyone? Nope, quite a few people I couldn't stand but I had a group of people who became close and dear to me.
Fast forward to June 13th, 2014- I graduated from nursing school. Fast forward to August 4th, 2014- I took the NCLEX and passed. I am now a certified practical nurse!
Josh and I saved up some money and lived in our camper trailer for 1 year and 1 month. It was definitely an adventure and I would do it again in a heartbeat if we needed to. We learned so much about each other; how to work in a small environment together, and since we didn't have much room we learned how to just sit there and talk (when I wasn't studying). I became closer with his family and he with mine. In May, we bought our first house. I haven't figured out how to use all the room we have but I'm sure I'll find some way. We have an acre of land and a huge back porch; the back porch is my favorite part of the house.
Back in March, during spring break, Josh and I decided to start trying for a baby. About a week ago I took a pregnancy test that came back positive. Josh was away on a job and didn't have cell
service. He made me promise before he left if I found anything out I would tell him immediately. Although I wanted to wait for him to come home and tell him, I ended up sending him an email. (Boo; I know). Regardless, he was excited! We had our first appointment yesterday and according to the doctor I am just over 5 weeks pregnant and the estimated due date is April 7th, 2015. We are trying to not get too excited until after the 1st Trimester (just in case) but it's kind of hard when I can physically feel the changes going on in my body right now. We surprised our parents last Sunday when we had them over for a fish fry. They definitely were not expecting anything and it felt good to see so much excitement in their faces when we told them.
Father God never ceases to amaze me. His blessings flow abundantly. I know not everything in life is rainbows and butterflies but I can say I see His hand move in every situation; both good and bad. He may allow me to carry this baby full term and He may allow me to miscarry. I am aware either could be the result. I don't want to speak that over the baby growing inside. God knows my heart and knows the heart of my husband. All we can do now is trust and know his will is what we want most in our lives.
Since school is over and Summer is coming to a close, I am hoping to have more free time to write. I don't know who all reads my posts but it's a type of therapy for me that I have missed doing. If you read it, great; if you don't, that's okay too.
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Just about everything from A to Z has happened since my post last July; so I'll start with August of 2013.
August I started nursing school back up. I cried daily for about a week straight and a quite a few times in the months following. The idea that I was starting all over again was unbearable. I didn't think I had the strength or willpower to complete it. God came through; just like He always does. He strengthened me and maybe I didn't always push forward for the right reasons but nevertheless, I pushed on. Many times, it was out of the desire to prove to the previous teachers and director over me I was called to be a nurse, no matter what they thought about me. God has called me from a very young age to be a nurse and I could not let what they thought or said get in the way of what God had destined inside me. I spent 10 grueling months in a fast paced program! You know what though? I learned a heck of a lot more than I did before. I had teachers that wanted us to learn, believed in each one of us, and wanted to see us succeed. The whole class dynamics were much different. We were a team, a group on the same journey with the same goals in mind. Did I get along with everyone? Nope, quite a few people I couldn't stand but I had a group of people who became close and dear to me.
Fast forward to June 13th, 2014- I graduated from nursing school. Fast forward to August 4th, 2014- I took the NCLEX and passed. I am now a certified practical nurse!
Josh and I saved up some money and lived in our camper trailer for 1 year and 1 month. It was definitely an adventure and I would do it again in a heartbeat if we needed to. We learned so much about each other; how to work in a small environment together, and since we didn't have much room we learned how to just sit there and talk (when I wasn't studying). I became closer with his family and he with mine. In May, we bought our first house. I haven't figured out how to use all the room we have but I'm sure I'll find some way. We have an acre of land and a huge back porch; the back porch is my favorite part of the house.
Back in March, during spring break, Josh and I decided to start trying for a baby. About a week ago I took a pregnancy test that came back positive. Josh was away on a job and didn't have cell
service. He made me promise before he left if I found anything out I would tell him immediately. Although I wanted to wait for him to come home and tell him, I ended up sending him an email. (Boo; I know). Regardless, he was excited! We had our first appointment yesterday and according to the doctor I am just over 5 weeks pregnant and the estimated due date is April 7th, 2015. We are trying to not get too excited until after the 1st Trimester (just in case) but it's kind of hard when I can physically feel the changes going on in my body right now. We surprised our parents last Sunday when we had them over for a fish fry. They definitely were not expecting anything and it felt good to see so much excitement in their faces when we told them.
Father God never ceases to amaze me. His blessings flow abundantly. I know not everything in life is rainbows and butterflies but I can say I see His hand move in every situation; both good and bad. He may allow me to carry this baby full term and He may allow me to miscarry. I am aware either could be the result. I don't want to speak that over the baby growing inside. God knows my heart and knows the heart of my husband. All we can do now is trust and know his will is what we want most in our lives.
Since school is over and Summer is coming to a close, I am hoping to have more free time to write. I don't know who all reads my posts but it's a type of therapy for me that I have missed doing. If you read it, great; if you don't, that's okay too.
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
Time Flies when You're having Fun...or Not!
It has been forever since I last wrote. Quite honestly, I can't remember what I last wrote about or when. I have been wanting to post for a few weeks now and have finally found the time to do so. They say time flies when you're having fun; I guess that's true although in my case it's just been way too busy. Where do I begin to catch you up on everything that's been going on?...
Let's start back in May. I withdrew from the LPN program for a number of different reasons. To make a long story short, there was an incident between a teacher and I and after the misunderstanding she began failing me in most all of the classes that I had with her. I could not seem to plead my case with the director of nursing and when it came down to it they were going to dismiss me. When I came to the school to have the meeting with my director and the teacher they had already packed up my desk and had everything sitting for me in the office. It truly was all unfair. I had never felt so degraded and put down in my educational career. I can only believe God has a better plan for me.
I am now currently enrolled in Moore Norman Technology Center and will be starting all over in the LPN program. Also another set back, but I'd like to think God is wanting me to do it all over again because by the time I withdrew from the program in Burns Flat, I was no longer learning anything but rather memorizing material for tests. I was told by my director in Burns Flat all my classes I completed would transfer. After I applied to the program at MNTC, I was informed none of my classes would transfer because it was a different curriculum.
So...what am I doing now? Just enjoying my summer and trying to get pumped up for August when I begin school again. Josh and I have moved back to Tuttle and are living in our camper trailer until we decide what we are going to do about living situations. We are debating on whether to buy a house, or build instead. We are saving up money right now for whatever we decide and waiting on some direction from God on what He wants us to do.
In the last few months I have seriously gone thru a grieving process. I have gone from anger to sadness, from sadness to anger, from anger to understanding, and from understanding to confusion. It seems to be a bit of a cycle. In the last few weeks I have done much better and know God has everything in his hands and I just need to trust Him. Yes, I'm upset because I was almost done with my schooling. Yes, I'm upset with the way I was treated. No, I don't think anything was handled in the proper manner. Yes, I know God is in control. Yes, I know He loves me and only wants the best for me. I take the punches that life hands me and try to give it over to my God. Josh has also been a big help. He has supported me every step of the way and encourages me to keep going. God really did create Josh just for me! I couldn't imagine being married to anyone else.
What's my point in this whole post? Basically, life isn't always fair. It doesn't always make the most sense. God has a plan for each of us though, We may not see his plan and we may get upset and frustrated along the way. Hold on though, God is making your life into a masterpiece; you will just have to wait and see the picture when it's finished.
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Let's start back in May. I withdrew from the LPN program for a number of different reasons. To make a long story short, there was an incident between a teacher and I and after the misunderstanding she began failing me in most all of the classes that I had with her. I could not seem to plead my case with the director of nursing and when it came down to it they were going to dismiss me. When I came to the school to have the meeting with my director and the teacher they had already packed up my desk and had everything sitting for me in the office. It truly was all unfair. I had never felt so degraded and put down in my educational career. I can only believe God has a better plan for me.
I am now currently enrolled in Moore Norman Technology Center and will be starting all over in the LPN program. Also another set back, but I'd like to think God is wanting me to do it all over again because by the time I withdrew from the program in Burns Flat, I was no longer learning anything but rather memorizing material for tests. I was told by my director in Burns Flat all my classes I completed would transfer. After I applied to the program at MNTC, I was informed none of my classes would transfer because it was a different curriculum.
So...what am I doing now? Just enjoying my summer and trying to get pumped up for August when I begin school again. Josh and I have moved back to Tuttle and are living in our camper trailer until we decide what we are going to do about living situations. We are debating on whether to buy a house, or build instead. We are saving up money right now for whatever we decide and waiting on some direction from God on what He wants us to do.
In the last few months I have seriously gone thru a grieving process. I have gone from anger to sadness, from sadness to anger, from anger to understanding, and from understanding to confusion. It seems to be a bit of a cycle. In the last few weeks I have done much better and know God has everything in his hands and I just need to trust Him. Yes, I'm upset because I was almost done with my schooling. Yes, I'm upset with the way I was treated. No, I don't think anything was handled in the proper manner. Yes, I know God is in control. Yes, I know He loves me and only wants the best for me. I take the punches that life hands me and try to give it over to my God. Josh has also been a big help. He has supported me every step of the way and encourages me to keep going. God really did create Josh just for me! I couldn't imagine being married to anyone else.
What's my point in this whole post? Basically, life isn't always fair. It doesn't always make the most sense. God has a plan for each of us though, We may not see his plan and we may get upset and frustrated along the way. Hold on though, God is making your life into a masterpiece; you will just have to wait and see the picture when it's finished.
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
God's Presence
It's been a while since I wrote. My excuse like every other time is...life has been busy. School has been going well. I am in my second trimester with one more to go. It has been a challenge but I am pushing through and loving every minute of it. Josh has been a big help through all of this and I can't imagine my life without him. He has been working hard, long hours and can't wait for some time off.
I wanted to write today because last night I went to my small group and we talked about the presence of God in our life. How in Exodus God told Moses that He would bless his people and Moses responded by saying in Exodus 33:15 "And he said unto him, if thy presence go not with me, carry us not up hence". What I find so amazing is how Moses didn't want to go without the presence of God. God promised that he would bless his people, bless their life, their lands, etc etc but Moses said if you don't go with us, we won't go. Can we do that in our own life, honestly? Can we want the presence of God so much that even if he promised us every blessing and every opportunity but we wouldn't have his presence in our life, could we be like Moses and want his presence above everything else? That's a hard thought. Isn't the presence of God everywhere constantly? I mean even in the darkest parts of Africa people know there is a God. His presence is everywhere. We can't get away from his presence.
We don't need to search for Him or his presence. Trying to obtain it, or search for it is doesn't make sense, it's already there. All we need to do is be still. But what does it mean when God says, "Seek and ye shall find"? He wants us to seek. It is in our human nature to search. Maybe he wants us to seek him out, even when he's already there; just to show us how much we want Him and need Him.
So even though this is a short post, my point is could we be like Moses and say we won't do anything or go anywhere without the presence of God in our life? Do we have anything standing in our way?
until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
I wanted to write today because last night I went to my small group and we talked about the presence of God in our life. How in Exodus God told Moses that He would bless his people and Moses responded by saying in Exodus 33:15 "And he said unto him, if thy presence go not with me, carry us not up hence". What I find so amazing is how Moses didn't want to go without the presence of God. God promised that he would bless his people, bless their life, their lands, etc etc but Moses said if you don't go with us, we won't go. Can we do that in our own life, honestly? Can we want the presence of God so much that even if he promised us every blessing and every opportunity but we wouldn't have his presence in our life, could we be like Moses and want his presence above everything else? That's a hard thought. Isn't the presence of God everywhere constantly? I mean even in the darkest parts of Africa people know there is a God. His presence is everywhere. We can't get away from his presence.
We don't need to search for Him or his presence. Trying to obtain it, or search for it is doesn't make sense, it's already there. All we need to do is be still. But what does it mean when God says, "Seek and ye shall find"? He wants us to seek. It is in our human nature to search. Maybe he wants us to seek him out, even when he's already there; just to show us how much we want Him and need Him.
So even though this is a short post, my point is could we be like Moses and say we won't do anything or go anywhere without the presence of God in our life? Do we have anything standing in our way?
until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Sunday, December 9, 2012
A Long December
"And it's been a long December and there's reason to believe,
Maybe this time will be better than the last.
I can't remember all the times I tried to tell myself
To hold on to these moments as they pass". -Counting Crows
Counting Crows is one of my favorite musical groups. They seem to nail every emotion right on the head. The songs make you actually stop and think about the words said and make you look deeper to figure out what they are trying to say. At first you hear it and think, "That made no sense at all!" but that's when you have to listen to it again and really LISTEN to the words. Then everything falls into place.
This December so far has been pretty crazy and we're just a little over a week into it. Josh has been working nonstop and I'm counting down the days til Christmas break. It can't seem to come soon enough!
We finally closed on the land last week! Praise God that whole ordeal is over. Now to get ready for Christmas! Many presents I am trying to make homemade this year. It is a little more difficult and I'd much rather go out and just buy something but I know it will be more special to get something that time and effort was put into. At least I hope that's the outcome!
In the last few weeks God has shown me more and more how I just need to rely on Him. When you think people will always be there for you and love you and be the person you once knew, you realize people change. The way they think, their attitude, their priorities. Sometimes everything changes and it's like you are looking at a stranger. It's when that realization hits you that God says," I am never changing". Yes, your heart hurts because you wish things were like they once were. Yet, you see how situations and life in general has changed a person and even as that person has changed, so have you in one way or another. God has shown me sometimes it's not their fault. They don't even realize the person they have become or see the changes that have occurred.
Isn't that what life is all about though? Changing? Some may say, 'yes' while others say, 'no' and honestly I don't know that there is a right or wrong answer here. If you change for the better then I would say that is a good thing, your life was supposed to take that turn. When you change for the worse, I can't say that's how it was supposed to be. God is in control of everything though, isn't He? You may not see His hand but you have to believe His heart and that's where the trust comes in. He has shown me to keep my heart focused on him; to be thankful for the past and the present, being thankful for each moment as it passes. Josh has been a huge help during this time as well. We have talked late into the night and he has held me as I cried for what once was.
God has given me a wonderful husband to lean on! I thank Him daily for the man he has blessed me with.
So, what's the point to this whole post? In a nutshell, people change. Period. Sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worse. God doesn't ever change though. He has never changed and never will. Rely on Him because if you don't, I guarantee you are just making your life alot harder on yourself. Be thankful for every situation, for every change. God's hand is always at work even when you can't see it.
"I guess the winter makes you laugh a little slower,
Makes you talk a little lower, about the things you could not show her".
- A Long December, Counting Crows
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Maybe this time will be better than the last.
I can't remember all the times I tried to tell myself
To hold on to these moments as they pass". -Counting Crows
Counting Crows is one of my favorite musical groups. They seem to nail every emotion right on the head. The songs make you actually stop and think about the words said and make you look deeper to figure out what they are trying to say. At first you hear it and think, "That made no sense at all!" but that's when you have to listen to it again and really LISTEN to the words. Then everything falls into place.
This December so far has been pretty crazy and we're just a little over a week into it. Josh has been working nonstop and I'm counting down the days til Christmas break. It can't seem to come soon enough!
We finally closed on the land last week! Praise God that whole ordeal is over. Now to get ready for Christmas! Many presents I am trying to make homemade this year. It is a little more difficult and I'd much rather go out and just buy something but I know it will be more special to get something that time and effort was put into. At least I hope that's the outcome!
In the last few weeks God has shown me more and more how I just need to rely on Him. When you think people will always be there for you and love you and be the person you once knew, you realize people change. The way they think, their attitude, their priorities. Sometimes everything changes and it's like you are looking at a stranger. It's when that realization hits you that God says," I am never changing". Yes, your heart hurts because you wish things were like they once were. Yet, you see how situations and life in general has changed a person and even as that person has changed, so have you in one way or another. God has shown me sometimes it's not their fault. They don't even realize the person they have become or see the changes that have occurred.
Isn't that what life is all about though? Changing? Some may say, 'yes' while others say, 'no' and honestly I don't know that there is a right or wrong answer here. If you change for the better then I would say that is a good thing, your life was supposed to take that turn. When you change for the worse, I can't say that's how it was supposed to be. God is in control of everything though, isn't He? You may not see His hand but you have to believe His heart and that's where the trust comes in. He has shown me to keep my heart focused on him; to be thankful for the past and the present, being thankful for each moment as it passes. Josh has been a huge help during this time as well. We have talked late into the night and he has held me as I cried for what once was.
God has given me a wonderful husband to lean on! I thank Him daily for the man he has blessed me with.
So, what's the point to this whole post? In a nutshell, people change. Period. Sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worse. God doesn't ever change though. He has never changed and never will. Rely on Him because if you don't, I guarantee you are just making your life alot harder on yourself. Be thankful for every situation, for every change. God's hand is always at work even when you can't see it.
"I guess the winter makes you laugh a little slower,
Makes you talk a little lower, about the things you could not show her".
- A Long December, Counting Crows
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
Monday, October 15, 2012
Faith, Trust, and Us
Don't worry, I'm not dead. I'm just extremely busy. For those who may not have known I made it into the LPN program here in Burns Flat and it seems all I do is study for tests and take tests. We average between 3-4 tests a week and have already started clinicals. It is fast paced and I love it! I especially love the fact that after Tuesday we will be on Fall Break until the next Monday. Josh was able to get off the same days as me so we will be able to spend a few days together celebrating our 1 year anniversary.
I cannot believe it's already been a year. Seems like just a few months ago we were saying 'I do'. Over this one year though I have found I love him more and more. He is my confidant, my rock, my best friend, my comedian...someone once told me, "Make sure you marry someone who can make you laugh, otherwise don't even think about it". There is something he is making laugh about daily. We really are two halves of a whole.
Josh continues to learn new tools so he is able to go out on a variety of jobs. He left this morning to train on a new tool he hasn't worked with before. He likes the opportunity to learn and try new things when it comes to his work.
We are hoping to close on the land here in the next week or two. It has been a long, drawn out process and I think we will both breath a sigh of relief when it's all finished.
I wanted to share the following story because it is amazing to me how God will speak us and just how well he knows how to grab our attention: A few months back I was sitting in church with Garrett (Josh's 5 year brother) sitting beside me. He had just came and sat down when God said to me,"There is a difference between faith and trust". I wasn't sure what He was trying to tell me but I continued to listen. He said,"You have faith in me to be your God. You know I will always be there for you, but you don't trust Me". I was about ready to argue with Him but He began showing me areas in my life I didn't trust Him in. Yes, I had faith that He would always be there as my God but didn't have trust to know that He would follow through with things as my Heavenly Father. As Garrett started to snuggle beside me God said,"He snuggles close beside you because he loves you and trusts you. Why can't you trust as a child and snuggle close to me?". I tried to give him excuses about why I didn't trust completely and why it was really hard but He just kept speaking to me. Garrett, at this point, had put his hand in mine and fallen asleep. As I sat there looking at Garrett and his tiny hand in mine God said, "Why can't you trust Me enough to be so comfortable with Me, you can just fall asleep in my arms. Look at his hand in yours, this is as your hand in Mine. I have held you since the beginning". Now, my heart is beginning to break because I saw how much my Heavenly Father just wanted my trust. He wanted my whole heart. Garrett's head had begun to stoop low and his neck looked painfully uncomfortable. I took him in my lap and placed him so that his neck was no longer in that awkward position. In doing so, my own neck began to ache and God said,"You move him so his neck doesn't hurt and allow the pain for yourself instead. How much more pain would I take from you as My child if you would let Me?". I knew what God wanted of me and it has been a struggle but I realize it is also a daily choice. We must choose daily to trust our Heavenly Father fully, partly, or not at all. He just wants us to have the faith and trust of a child...like Garrett with me.
I guess that is all for now. I suspect you will see from me again around Thanksgiving, which is when my next longer break is.
Until next time,
ActoinJacksontheAngloSaxon
I cannot believe it's already been a year. Seems like just a few months ago we were saying 'I do'. Over this one year though I have found I love him more and more. He is my confidant, my rock, my best friend, my comedian...someone once told me, "Make sure you marry someone who can make you laugh, otherwise don't even think about it". There is something he is making laugh about daily. We really are two halves of a whole.
Josh continues to learn new tools so he is able to go out on a variety of jobs. He left this morning to train on a new tool he hasn't worked with before. He likes the opportunity to learn and try new things when it comes to his work.
We are hoping to close on the land here in the next week or two. It has been a long, drawn out process and I think we will both breath a sigh of relief when it's all finished.
I wanted to share the following story because it is amazing to me how God will speak us and just how well he knows how to grab our attention: A few months back I was sitting in church with Garrett (Josh's 5 year brother) sitting beside me. He had just came and sat down when God said to me,"There is a difference between faith and trust". I wasn't sure what He was trying to tell me but I continued to listen. He said,"You have faith in me to be your God. You know I will always be there for you, but you don't trust Me". I was about ready to argue with Him but He began showing me areas in my life I didn't trust Him in. Yes, I had faith that He would always be there as my God but didn't have trust to know that He would follow through with things as my Heavenly Father. As Garrett started to snuggle beside me God said,"He snuggles close beside you because he loves you and trusts you. Why can't you trust as a child and snuggle close to me?". I tried to give him excuses about why I didn't trust completely and why it was really hard but He just kept speaking to me. Garrett, at this point, had put his hand in mine and fallen asleep. As I sat there looking at Garrett and his tiny hand in mine God said, "Why can't you trust Me enough to be so comfortable with Me, you can just fall asleep in my arms. Look at his hand in yours, this is as your hand in Mine. I have held you since the beginning". Now, my heart is beginning to break because I saw how much my Heavenly Father just wanted my trust. He wanted my whole heart. Garrett's head had begun to stoop low and his neck looked painfully uncomfortable. I took him in my lap and placed him so that his neck was no longer in that awkward position. In doing so, my own neck began to ache and God said,"You move him so his neck doesn't hurt and allow the pain for yourself instead. How much more pain would I take from you as My child if you would let Me?". I knew what God wanted of me and it has been a struggle but I realize it is also a daily choice. We must choose daily to trust our Heavenly Father fully, partly, or not at all. He just wants us to have the faith and trust of a child...like Garrett with me.
I guess that is all for now. I suspect you will see from me again around Thanksgiving, which is when my next longer break is.
Until next time,
ActoinJacksontheAngloSaxon
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Time has Gotten Away
I can't believe it's been so long since I last wrote. I don't even know where to begin to explain what all has been going on. I guess let me start with saying, I've been busy. Work, husband, life in general has kept me on the go and when I finally do find time to just relax there seems to be something that needs to be done. Whether it's a load of laundry or dusting; or maybe it's just the fact I can't sit still for too lond so I am always finding something to do.
If you don't know, I have been accepted in the LPN program here in Burns Flat. I will start next month and will finish in about a year. I am excited and scared at the same time. I don't know how it will all work but I just have to have faith that God will work it out for me.
My job has gotten better. As you know, I really didn't like it at first but it seems the more I work there the more grace God has given me. He has given me more patience and a greater love for people. Don't get me wrong because I still have days where I just don't want to be there whatsoever but there are days too when I know it's what I'm supposed to be doing, for the time being anyway.
Josh has been keeping busy with work. He is continuing to learn more tools and they continue to have a job for him somewhere. I can't complain though. This last week he has come home to me just about every night
We have decided to buy land on his grandfather's farm. Another relative is wanting to sell his share and Josh wants to build a house on that land in the future. I support him 100% and think that although we may not be able to do anything with the land right now maybe ten years from now we can raise our kids there. The same way he was raised on that land too.
We went on a little vacation back at the end of May to Gatlinburg, Tennessee. It was beautiful! I told Josh if he ever got transferred to Tennessee I would not complain. It's just so peaceful. We stayed in a little secluded cabin up in the mountains and was able to drive through the Smokies and do some sight seeing.
We are going camping at the end of this month for a week. I am looking forward to it very much! A family friend was selling their little camper and it is just the right size for us. We bought it and Gabe is cleaning it up for us and fixing some little things in the camper before we go. I'm glad Gabe offered to do it for us because I am working up to the day before we leave. I have a day off here and there but not enough time to do stuff for the camper. He has done a really good job on it so far so I have to give him his props. THANKS GABE!! I LOVE YOU!!
We have found a church we like in Elk City. Their heart is all for the things of God. They are just on fire with His love right now and you can feel it when you walk in the building. It is great! We have not joined or anything yet but we have gone there for about a month now.
Speaking of church and having a fire....my Mother-in-law has gone on a mission trip to India with a group from God's House and Branded by God. They will be there for two weeks and basically what they are doing is taking kids off the street, giving them food and shelter (they have built orphanages), and just showing them God's love. They are fathering the fatherless. I don't think they could have picked a better woman to go. Children are her heart. Pray for them as they should be arriving today I believe. Pray not only their eyes and hearts will be open, but also the eyes and hearts of the children they will be ministering to.
On a completely separate note but one I would like to address. It has come to my attention some people think Josh and I did not 'wait' til marriage. Here I am setting the record straight. YES WE DID! Believe me, I know! If you have questions or want to ask me about stuff then do so. I promise I won't be mad. I'd rather you tell me stuff to my face then go talk to other people about it. I am not mad now but that is something very serious to me.
I guess that's really about it for now. My life is busy but I'm loving every minute of it. God provides and blesses us continually. I can't complain.
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
If you don't know, I have been accepted in the LPN program here in Burns Flat. I will start next month and will finish in about a year. I am excited and scared at the same time. I don't know how it will all work but I just have to have faith that God will work it out for me.
My job has gotten better. As you know, I really didn't like it at first but it seems the more I work there the more grace God has given me. He has given me more patience and a greater love for people. Don't get me wrong because I still have days where I just don't want to be there whatsoever but there are days too when I know it's what I'm supposed to be doing, for the time being anyway.
Josh has been keeping busy with work. He is continuing to learn more tools and they continue to have a job for him somewhere. I can't complain though. This last week he has come home to me just about every night
We have decided to buy land on his grandfather's farm. Another relative is wanting to sell his share and Josh wants to build a house on that land in the future. I support him 100% and think that although we may not be able to do anything with the land right now maybe ten years from now we can raise our kids there. The same way he was raised on that land too.
We went on a little vacation back at the end of May to Gatlinburg, Tennessee. It was beautiful! I told Josh if he ever got transferred to Tennessee I would not complain. It's just so peaceful. We stayed in a little secluded cabin up in the mountains and was able to drive through the Smokies and do some sight seeing.
We are going camping at the end of this month for a week. I am looking forward to it very much! A family friend was selling their little camper and it is just the right size for us. We bought it and Gabe is cleaning it up for us and fixing some little things in the camper before we go. I'm glad Gabe offered to do it for us because I am working up to the day before we leave. I have a day off here and there but not enough time to do stuff for the camper. He has done a really good job on it so far so I have to give him his props. THANKS GABE!! I LOVE YOU!!
We have found a church we like in Elk City. Their heart is all for the things of God. They are just on fire with His love right now and you can feel it when you walk in the building. It is great! We have not joined or anything yet but we have gone there for about a month now.
Speaking of church and having a fire....my Mother-in-law has gone on a mission trip to India with a group from God's House and Branded by God. They will be there for two weeks and basically what they are doing is taking kids off the street, giving them food and shelter (they have built orphanages), and just showing them God's love. They are fathering the fatherless. I don't think they could have picked a better woman to go. Children are her heart. Pray for them as they should be arriving today I believe. Pray not only their eyes and hearts will be open, but also the eyes and hearts of the children they will be ministering to.
On a completely separate note but one I would like to address. It has come to my attention some people think Josh and I did not 'wait' til marriage. Here I am setting the record straight. YES WE DID! Believe me, I know! If you have questions or want to ask me about stuff then do so. I promise I won't be mad. I'd rather you tell me stuff to my face then go talk to other people about it. I am not mad now but that is something very serious to me.
I guess that's really about it for now. My life is busy but I'm loving every minute of it. God provides and blesses us continually. I can't complain.
Until next time,
ActionJacksontheAngloSaxon
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